this blog will self-destruct in five seconds: futbol

Showing posts with label futbol. Show all posts

Showing posts with label futbol. Show all posts

13 March 2008

little manchunian fail

inspired by Fail Blog

10 March 2008

proof he's a better actor than the real thing

MADRID, March 8 (Reuters) - A prankster pretending to be Oscar-winning American actor Nicolas Cage fooled Real Madrid into thinking he was the real thing and enjoyed red carpet treatment at this week's Champions League match against AS Roma.

The lookalike, Italian television presenter Paolo Calabresi, watched Wednesday's game from the directors' viewing area at the Bernabeu and was taken into the team dressing room afterwards, Spanish sports daily Marca reported on Saturday. He was even photographed being presented with a personalised Real shirt by club president Ramon Calderon.

Priceless. No one else is as deserving of this trickery than that douchebag Calderon.

Of course I'm rooting for the Arse to win the Champions League - but I've got a soft spot for Roma. A quarterfinal tie of Arsenal-Roma would be mind-blowing. Two of the most attack-minded teams in Europe going at it...shit. Can't wait for the draw on Friday...

10 January 2008

quote of the day

In a video titled "Top 7 Gaffes That Had Fergie Fuming" - Fergie being Sir Alex Ferguson, longstanding manager of Manchester United FC - the narrator unleashes this beauty around 1:45:

Fabien Barthez, sometimes a maverick, sometimes an enigma, always a twat!

At least he didn't call him a "stupid French frog twat".

29 December 2007

midpoint of the season

Barclays Premier League : Table
29 Dec 19:22

			\| Home					\| Away
	Team	P	W	D	L	F	A	W	D	L	F	A	GD	PTS
1	Arsenal	20	9	1	0	23	7	5	4	1	17	9	24	47
2	Man Utd	20	9	1	0	22	3	5	2	3	15	8	26	45
3	Chelsea	20	6	4	0	20	8	6	1	3	11	7	16	41
4	Liverpool	18	4	4	1	20	6	6	2	1	13	6	21	36

5	Man City	19	9	1	0	19	7	1	4	4	8	15	5	35
6	Everton	20	6	1	3	22	11	4	2	4	13	11	13	33

7	Aston Villa	20	5	1	4	14	13	4	5	1	21	13	9	33
8	Portsmouth	20	2	6	2	11	8	6	1	3	18	12	9	31
9	West Ham	19	3	4	3	12	11	5	1	3	13	6	8	29
10	Blackburn	19	4	2	4	11	12	3	4	2	14	15	-2	27
11	Newcastle	20	5	3	2	16	15	2	2	6	11	16	-4	26
12	Tottenham	20	5	1	4	30	21	1	5	4	11	15	5	24
13	Reading	20	6	1	3	14	13	0	3	7	15	29	-13	22
14	Middlesbrough	20	2	3	4	11	15	3	2	6	7	18	-15	20
15	Birmingham	20	3	3	4	12	12	2	1	7	10	19	-9	19
16	Bolton	20	4	3	3	15	9	0	2	8	7	23	-10	17
17	Sunderland	20	4	3	3	11	13	0	2	8	9	26	-19	17

18	Wigan	20	4	2	4	13	12	0	2	8	7	24	-16	16
19	Fulham	20	2	5	3	15	16	0	4	6	6	19	-14	15
20	Derby	19	1	2	6	6	17	0	2	8	3	26	-34	7

Arsenal are back on top and it still sucks to be Derby County.

Listen up around 0:10. An idiot scouser got himself close to the field microphones on today's Arsenal-Everton match. He has a nice message for Arsenal left-back Gael Clichy...

*If you are confused by all the numbers here is a hint - the only important statistic is the points column on the far right.

**A scouser is someone from Liverpool. Here is the scouse alphabet.

21 December 2007

marx claims it was offside

The Greeks may have won that match, but Crispin alerts us to a new battle between zee Germans.

15 December 2007

don fabio

Some interesting tidbits on newly hired England national team manager Fabio Capello:

Nine league titles in 16 seasons with four clubs – an even better pedigree than Steve McClaren. But only once, in 1994, has Capello won the Champions League.

He's a proven winner. He's also brutally honest...

Capello could find employment as the Government’s obesity tsar if results go badly. “Aren’t you ashamed of being so fat?” Capello asked Ronaldo while in charge of Real in January. The Brazil striker waddled off to AC Milan.

And he doesn't mind engaging in verbal fisticuffs...

Capello fought with Paolo Di Canio during AC Milan’s tour to China in 1996 after the former West Ham United forward told him not to take the games so seriously. “Your face looks like a penis,” Capello said.

This is precisely what England needs. Don't listen to the xenophobic douchebags who think England should have an English manager. There are no good English managers!

02 December 2007

ballon d'or

I may love gooooooold, but I still belong to Jesus.

The title of European Footballer of the Year has been awarded to Brazilian ace Kaká. If I were him I'd be quite disappointed - where was Monica Bellucci to present the trophy this year?

Did Kaká deserve the award? That's difficult to say when you look at the other names on the short list: Cristiano Ronaldo, Didier Drogba, Zlatan Ibrahimović, Cesc Fabregas, Robinho, Francesco Totti and Juan Román Riquelme.

Kaká primarily won the award because his team (AC Milan) won Europe's (and the world's) most prestigious club competition, the UEFA Champions League. He single-handedly destroyed Manchester United in the Champions League semi-final.

Last year the Golden Ball award went to Italian defender Fabio Cannavaro who had just captained his national side to victory in the 2006 World Cup. Had France won the World Cup final, Zinedine Zidane would have probably received the award.

I don't know much about college football, but I get the feeling that the Heisman trophy is typically awarded to the quarterback, running back or wide-receiver of a national championship side, or at least a team ranked in the top five. In other words, it pays to be on a winning team.

22 November 2007

england are the cubs of world football

Yesterday was do or die for England. All they needed was a draw against Croatia in this last game of qualification and they would be on their way to the Euro 2008 tournament next summer. Due to the important nature of this game, I went to watch it with a bunch of English fans at The Olde Ship in Santa Ana. A couple pints of Boddingtons and a plate of curry and chips later...

Goalkeeper Scott Carson, who will forever be known as "Horror Show", allowed two easy goals to put England down 0-2 by halftime. Fat Frank Lampard converted a penalty in the 50th minute and Peter Crouch scored a killer goal in the 65th minute. It looked as if they might hold on for 25 minutes to earn their much needed draw. But it wasn't to be. Croatia scored another and the match ended 2-3. When I left the packed pub, their clientele of British ex-pats was not too pleased.

The England defense was probably the worst I've ever seen. The Croatians were running circles around the them. The nation that invented the game has failed to qualify for their own continental tournament. The Irish and the Scots, who both failed to qualify, must be rolling in schadenfreude at England's failure.

The morning after: The England coach was sacked and the fans are voicing their disgust. The English players can spend next summer on holiday instead of playing the likes of Italy, France, Poland, Portugal, Russia, Croatia, Greece, Turkey, Germany, Czech Republic, Spain, Sweden, Romania and the Netherlands.

Mi esposa and I will be in Spain and France during the tournament (which takes place in Austria and Switzerland) so I plan on watching a few games with local fans at pubs in Madrid, Barcelona and Paris.

03 November 2007

gunners top of the league

Arsenal 2 - 2 Manchester United


Team	P	W	D	L	Pts
1. Arsenal	10	8	2	0	26
2. Manchester United	11	8	2	1	26
3. Manchester City	11	7	1	3	22
4. Chelsea	11	6	3	2	21
5. Blackburn Rovers	10	6	3	1	21
6. Liverpool	10	5	5	0	20
7. Portsmouth	11	5	4	2	19
8. Newcastle Utd	10	5	2	3	17
9. Everton	11	5	1	5	16
10. Aston Villa	10	4	3	3	15
11. West Ham Utd	10	4	2	4	14
12. Reading	11	4	1	6	13
13. Birmingham City	11	3	2	6	11
14. Fulham	11	1	6	4	9
15. Sunderland	11	2	3	6	9
16. Wigan Athletic	11	2	2	7	8
17. Middlesbrough	11	2	2	7	8
18. Tottenham Hotspur	11	1	4	6	7
19. Bolton Wanderers	11	1	3	7	6
20. Derby County	11	1	3	7	6

Now if only it could stay that way.

Here's to William Gallas for the late equalizer!

24 October 2007

i love champions league week*

It feels good to score. Ray Hudson would call it orgasmic.

Chelski forward Didier Drogba might miss Jose, but he's still finding the net for Abramovich.

Don't mess with him when he's hungry. Bayern Munich goalkeeper Oliver Kahn will eat you alive.

Young Gunner Theo Walcott scored twice in Arsenal's 7-0 demolition of Slavia Prague in the UEFA Champions League.

And finally, with the Galaxy's season ending prematurely, David Beckham realizes that he couldn't live up to the hype. Well, there's always Sunday afternoon pick up games at Tom Cruise's house...

*inspired by LOL Jocks

20 October 2007

ginga

Real Madrid forward Robinho meets up with futsal star Falcão in Brasil for some indoor freestyling.

13 September 2007

lolbecks

09 September 2007

little mikey owen scores against israel

It's been a great weekend for deportes. The Rugby World Cup just started, there are Euro 2008 qualifier matches and the NFL bonanza is about to kick off in a few hours.

Here is a nice goal from England striker Michael Owen against Israel. He actually made it through the game without injuring his knees or breaking his feet!*

England won the match 3-0.

But it's hard to beat the excitement from last weekend watching DeSean Jackson's 77-yard punt return and touchdown for Berkeley against the University of Tennessee.

You've got to love YouTube - these clips (1 and 2) were offered up as "related videos" to the Owen goal. Similarly, last week the Serrach noted this humorous Romney campaign ad came with some interesting related videos:

Perhaps the YouTube is trying to tell us something...

16 July 2007

i was happy on sunday

Brazil 3 - 0 Argentina - Alves
Uploaded by FootballHeaven

Brazil stunned the tournament favorites Argentina to snag their eighth Copa America title. Above is their 3rd goal from fullback Daniel Alves, assisted by a sweet defense-slicing pass from Vagner Love. Julio Baptista's 1st goal ain't too shabby either.

23 June 2007

hugo chavez is an idiot

Everyone's favorite Bolivarian revolutionary thinks 21st century socialism will drive the Venezuelan national soccer team to victory in the Copa America:

“[Lula] I’m warning you; later on don’t say we were rude to anyone because we will beat Brazil 3-0, or [will beat] Argentina. Nestor Kirchner don’t get offended”.

Chavez also sent greetings to Fidel Castro and said: “Thank god Cuba isn’t in the Copa America, because if they were we would have beaten them 5-0”.

He also made note of the fact that in the past the Venezuelan national team was the weakest in the region, and would be thrashed by every side, but added that this has changed and now they “scare” [the opposition] like a “war tank”.

The Copa America, held this year in Venezuela, lasts from June 26 to July 15. The tournament features most nations from South America and this year's invitees the United States and Mexico. The U.S. doesn't have a chance. They are bringing an inexperienced, young squad to combat in hostile terrority against their group members Argentina, Colombia and Paraguay. If they can make it out of their group then all props go out to the Yanks. Mexico should benefit from the leadership of skipper Rafael Marquez who was absent from this year's Copa Oro. The Copa Oro final - an expected U.S.-Mexico match-up - is tomorrow.

If Venezuela make it out of their group - the keyword being if - they would most likely face Argentina, Mexico, Brasil or Uruguay in the next round. Historically, these four sides excel at the Copa. Based on the composition of Argentina's squad I'd bet cash on them winning the trophy.

So I doubt Chavez's boys have a chance. But keep an eye out on this tournament, even if you don't give a damn about mi deporte favorito. Chavez has banned protests near stadiums to prevent his political opposition from stealing the limelight during these public events. Just wait, I can imagine Hugo giving impassioned speeches before each game to rally his political supporters. I'm hoping it doesn't turn into a political circus and stays focused on el futbol. Hmm, maybe we should have listened to the good ol' Reverend Pat...

au revoir y bienvenidos

Arsenal captain Thierry Henry (seen above hanging with his pal and French compatriot Tony Parker) will be wearing an FC Barcelona jersey come this fall. Barcelona paid $32 million for the 29-year old French striker who scored a club-record of 226 goals in 364 appearances at Arsenal since 1999.

Lately, he's been unsatisfied with his 4th place London-based club and their unwillingness to bring on big-named talent. Just look at that photo - can't you see him lusting after Parker's NBA trophy? Henry's complaints are not too dissimilar to Kobe Bryant's qualms against the Lakers. However, Monsieur Henry has class. He has never dissed Arsenal and always maintained the highest respect for his club whereas Kobe is currently burning his bridges with the Jerry Buss and company.

At Barcelona Henry will be joining superstars Ronaldinho, Messi and Eto'o. Can you say Galacticos? Pack your squad with the best in the world and expect to dominate the league, right? It's worked for the Yankees! Oh, wait - nevermind. Let's hope Barca doesn't travel the same road as Real Madrid did earlier this decade. They had some of the best players in the world - Ronaldo, Zidane, Beckham, Figo, etc. - but their attack-minded side playing a 4-3-3 conceded too many goals and thus never won a La Liga title. Madrid won the title this year because Don Fabio Capello retooled the squad with better defenders and holding midfielders.

Here are a couple of Henry compilations featuring his smooth moves and some choice goals.

07 June 2007

another sign of the rapture

Le Hibou Finlandais
Uploaded by Sambabugatti

This must be a first. An owl disrupted the Belgium-Finland Euro 2008 qualifier yesterday, swooping down on the pitch and taking up a brief residence on the goal post. Mr. Owl caused the game to be postponed for several minutes until he left the pitch. That's why I love this game. Anything can happen.

31 May 2007

pobre pedro

This is what you get for covering the English FA Cup final...

The sad part is, that was the most exciting part of the day at Wembley. Trust me, I paid $15 to watch the game on pay-per-view and I was not amused. Both Chelsea and ManYoo can go suck it.

23 May 2007

2007 champions league final

This year's Champions League Final -- the equivalent of the Super Bowl for European football -- was held in Athens. Thousands of AC Milan and Liverpool fans descending into the city meant the cops had to prepare for some serious riff-raff.

How nice of the officer on the right to provide a bullseye.

Now hooligans, like the ugly scouser above, can pinpoint their molotov cocktails in the abdomen region.

What's Billy Zane doing in Greece? Nevermind, it's Zidane, almost one year into retirement making an appearance at the pre-game festivities.

AC Milan chairman Silvio Berlusconi showed up with my boy Ronaldo -- looking quite scholarly I might add -- who can't play for the Rossoneri in this year's competition since he already played for Real Madrid earlier in the year.

Ok, the game. Liverpool dominated the first half and had at least three chances. But they gave up a free kick in the 45th minute which Pirlo sent to Inzaghi for a goal. Milan seemed more secure in the 2nd half, having a goal under their belt and feeling a bit more at ease. Inzaghi got a 2nd goal in the 82nd minute beating the Liverpool keeper after a sweet pass by Kaka. Liverpool striker Dirk Kuyt scored in the 89th minute but it was too late.

The game ended in regular time, 2-1 for Milan.

Liverpool captain Steven Gerrard facing reality.

Kaka better give Jesus his shirt back. That's not cool to steal the Lord's clothing.

And that's Milan's 7th Champions League trophy.

They've got a knack for this competition.

17 May 2007

super estrella! numero uno en exitos!

it's about time for some musica, so press play or launch a standalone player and take it on the go...

Every summer I allow myself at least one guilty pleasure. That is, a craptastic pop song - typically one overplayed on LA's own KIIS FM - that I permit to invade my head. This year it is Gwen Stefani's Sweet Escape (track 3). Don't ask me why I dig it, perhaps it's the back-up singer yelping "woo-hoo, wee-ooh". I enjoy tormenting mi esposa by continually shouting "woo-hoo, wee-ooh" throughout the house. Even the dog thinks yo soy loco.

That said, summer is almost here. I can't wait to watch the U.S. men's national team eat shit in Caracas for the Copa America. (They are sending a B team and they're in a group with Argentina, Paraguay and Colombia, so what do you expect?) Go Brasil! Caipirinhas, anyone? (And yes, you too Miss Brasil).

Hmm, I think Argentina has the edge this year.

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